


Meditation

by Tsubaki94



Series: The Pro's and Con's of being Danny Phantom [7]
Category: Danny Phantom
Genre: Gen, Meditation, Short Story
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-17
Updated: 2017-06-17
Packaged: 2018-11-15 04:40:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,343
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11223522
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tsubaki94/pseuds/Tsubaki94
Summary: Anger fills Danny as he reads the newspaper, 'Why do they alays have to blame Phantom for everything, he thinks as he reads in the waitingroom.This is a short story in which Danny has to deal with his emothions and learns how to deal with dessisions he regrets.





	Meditation

**Author's Note:**

> Once more I will apologize for my spelling mistakes, I write this fanfic because I enjoy it and like to share it with others who do to, If you've got any questions don't hesitate to ask.

The phantom menace strikes again.

Amity Park was the victim of a viscus terrorist attack this Sunday when five as of yet unnamed individuals took an entire shopping mall hostage in the middle of the Christmas shopping. The police and FBI had everything under control up until the moment Danny Phantom, aka Inviso Bill. Showed up. Eyewitnesses placed Phantom both in and around the mall during the day. “I saw him trigger the bomb that brought the whole building down.” Said Elisabeth Hawk during an interview on sight. “The monster tried to kill us all, he froze the f-ing ground as we were trying to get out.” Said a shaken security guard from the now destroyed mall.

Is this the beginning of another terror Christmas, Will Phantom come for us when we least expect it. Mayor Master advices everyone to stay calm and is reassuring the people that Phantom will be dealt with in due time, but one must ask how many more will die by the ghosts hand…

Danny stopped reading and looked at the picture attached to the article. For once there wasn’t a picture of him just what was left of the shopping mall and the ice construct, smoke still rising from the sides and panicked people running away. The article had gotten the third page after bigger headline Shopping terror.

Flicking to the next page the newspaper continued on the subject of the Sunday and even if that article didn’t say it out right it was hinted that the cause of it all was him. But what did they know, sure they had eyewitnesses but they had only seen what they thought they saw. Although the one say he tried to kill them by freezing the ground wasn’t half wrong, Danny had tried to stop them from leaving at the same time he tried to save them from getting crushed.

Throwing the newspaper on to the chair beside him Danny rubbed at his head, he still had a headache from that day and would rather have stayed at home the last two days sleeping than go back to school only to get beaten by Dash. And Dash hadn’t been wrong, Danny had pushed him in to a restricted aria swarming with cops, just to make an distraction. Somewhere inside of him he felt like he deserved the beating, after all he’d destroyed what little trust there was between him and Dash when he pushed him.

He dug his nails in to the sides of his head, he’d made many mistakes that day and people had gotten hurt, people he knew. The flag outside of Casper High had been on half-mast and there had been a silent moment that Monday to honor the dead. Sam and Tucker could have been among them if Danny hadn’t been there, instead they were just bruised and like him tired. He could have done more to protect people, he could have taken them all out, made them all intangible and let them walk out without getting as much as a scratch, but he hadn’t.

Danny didn’t noticed the man walking out of the elevator opposite the waiting area, he didn’t notice him calling his name and it wasn’t before Gideon knelt down and pried his fingers away from his face that Danny realized he was there. “Hi.” He said giving Danny as soft smile. “Shall we go to my office?” He said ,never losing eye-contact with the boy he rose.

Rubbing his eyes Danny picked up his jacket and followed the Psychiatrist in to the elevator. After their first meeting Danny had been told by his social worker that he were to have a session a week with the man for the following four months. He’d gotten the impression that if he didn’t he wouldn’t be allowed to go home to his parents, and however much he disliked psychiatrists Gideon had turned out to be less pushy than he was used to.

They entered Gideon’s office on the third floor, it was a small room that resembled a living room more than an office, he didn’t even have a desk. “Take a seat Daniel.” Said Gideon holding the door open for Danny. “Do you want coffee or tea?” He asked watching the teenager sit down in the corner of the couch.

“Tea.” Sighed Danny kicking of his shoes and pulling his knees up to his chin.

Putting a “Do not disturbed” sign on the outside of the door Gideon closed it and walked over to a small table where he had an espresso machine and a collection of different colored mugs. He didn’t speak at first taking a mug from his collection and filling it with hot water. “You want milk or sugar?” he asked more out of habit having learned from their first session that Danny didn’t like sweet things.

“Honey.” Mumbled the teenager his clear blue eyes following Gideon’s every move.

Making the tea for Danny Gideon made himself a coupe of coffee before walking over to the couch. He handed Danny the cup of tea before sitting down at the opposite end of the couch, watching as the boy stirred his tea before sipping at it. “Shall we start with the obvious question.” Gideon began getting Danny’s full attention. “How have you been?”

Staring in to his tea Danny thought about the question. How had he been? He’d been tired beyond belief, annoyed beyond comparison and scared out of his mind and he couldn’t put words to any of it. “Can we start with another question?” Asked Danny sipping his tea enjoying the sweet taste of honey and ginger.

“Sure.” Gideon smiled, “What have you been up to since our last session? Did anything happen?” Danny looked up in to Gideon’s steady gray green eyes wondering what he knew of what had happened the last few days.

“I…” Danny began before closing his mouth and thinking about his answer. “I think I ruined my relationship with… a friend.” He said thinking of Dash. It might be the only subject he could take up with Gideon, it was something normal.

“You hesitated when you said Friend, Why?” Takin a sip of his coffee Gideon shifted to sit more comfortably.

“Cus he’s my bully at school.” Sighed Danny leaning his forehead against his knees. “But we…” Gideon waited for Danny to think through his answer. “I learned things about him and we sort of got along the last couple of weeks. It wasn’t like he invited me or my friends to sit at the same table during lunch but… I didn’t have to look over my shoulder thinking he was going to take out his frustrations on me during school.” And now he’d practiced running away again.

There was a moment of silence as Gideon let the words sink in. “What changed it?” He asked never taking his eyes of Danny, watching as he pressed his head harder against his knees before relaxing his shoulders.

“I pushed him in to a difficult position and got a black eye for it.” Lifting his head Danny took a big gulp of his tea. Saying the words out loud felt good.

Nodding Gideon put his half full coffee mug on the table. “Can you tell me why?” he asked trying to push the teenager for a bit more information.

Shrugging Danny leaned back. “To get to my friends.” He said not really remembering the reasoning behind his decision to push Dash.

There was another moment of silence before Gideon spoke again. “I heard from your social worker that you can go home to your parents on Friday.” Danny nodded he’d also gotten the news the day before. “How do you feel about returning home, you’ve been gone for a couple of weeks now?”

That was a good question, living with his parents was always noisy, dangerous and there was never a dull moment. Living with Mrs Oswald, her son and Danielle had almost been like having a normal life. There were no ghost alarm going off at odd moments in the night, no one kicked in his door to tell him that there was nothing to worry about, the food was great and he got to know his cousin. And yet he missed sneaking in after his curfew, he missed the embarrassment of having his mother kiss him on the cheek and then having to rub away her lipstick. He missed his dad showing of the new inventions only to have them explode or point to him. He missed his mom’s cooking, his father’s booming voice, the soft hum that could be heard whenever they did some kind of experiment in the lab or did the weekly cheeks of the defenses in the ops center.

Gideon was about to ask another question when Danny spoke. “I miss home.” He said turning his mug around watching the brown liquid move.

“What do you miss about it?” Asked Gideon taking sip of his coffee, it was hard to get Danny to talk about his home, because of his current situation but from what he’d been told Danny’s parents were scientists specializing on hunting ghosts and that sometimes meant that their children got a shoved to the side.

“My room.” Danny began looking forward to a night when he didn’t have to look for traps or pranks pulled by Cody. “Not having so far to go to school. Mom, Dad. Just being home.” He looked up to meet Gideon’s eyes. “I just miss home.” He said putting a lot more meaning in to the words than could ever be said.

Nodding Gideon sighed, he was happy the boy felt like his parents were part of his home and a bit bad about the next question he was going to ask. “I’m glad you’re going home. Mrs Stewarts mentioned something else when we talked. She said you were in the mall that was attacked this Sunday.” It was like he’d flicked a switch. Danny’s eyes grew dull and a shadow crossed his face as the boy tensed up once more. “What happened?”

“If you want to know what happened you can read the newspapers, they covered the whole thing thoroughly.” He shot back avoiding Gideon’s eyes once again.

Sighing Gideon leaned back. “But they never covered your side of the story, that’s what I want to know. What did you see, how did you feel? I don’t care what the newspapers say happen I care about your story.”

Something in Gideon’s words seemed to have an effect on Danny as he leaned forward hiding his face behind his knees. Gideon considered pushing the boy a bit more when Danny spoke. “There were crappy Christmas music, explosions, people were scared and everything came crashing down, the end.”

Smiling lightly Gideon leaned forward. “Were you there alone?”

Shaking his head Danny considered his answer. He’d never been alone, first he’d been stuck with Dash, then he’d tried to help the FBI and then Tucker had been there beside him. “I was there with my friends.” He said avoiding lying.

“What did you feel when you were there, were you scared?” The question sounded a bit odd even in Gideon’s ears, he could have phrased it better, but then again he wasn’t an English teacher.

There was another silence as Danny thought, Gideon noticed that the boys hands on the mug harden, the knuckles turning white. “Yes.” Was the short answer.

He couldn’t help but to ask, “Where you angry?”

“Yes.” Answered Danny nodding as well. He’d been angry, he’d been scared. Angry with himself and afraid of losing his friends.

Drinking the rest of his coffee Gideon placed the mug back on the table. “Alright, you were scared, afraid and angry. How do you deal with those emotions?”

It took a moment for Danny to register the question and he lifted his head to stare at Gideon as if he was speaking in another laughed. “Uh What?” he asked getting a soft smile from the psychiatrist.

“When you’re feeling afraid, or when you are angry what do you do? How do you take control over your emotions?” He spoke slowly and deliberately trying to make eye-contact with the boy once more.

Thinking Danny could remember several times he’d been scared, but the times he’d been really scared and not wanting anyone else to see him break he’d breathed, same thing when he was trying to control his anger. He’d fallen back on what he’d learned while spending many long hours sitting on a glazier. “I breath.” He answered Gideon shivering at the memory of the first time Frostbite had taken him to the glazier and thought him to meditate, to find his center and evolve the power within himself.

“You just breath, nothing else?” Asked Gideon seeing that there was more to the answer than Danny was giving.  
Finishing his own cup of tea, Danny placed it on the table as well. “Not just breath, I sort of center myself, calm down… it’s hard to explain.” Frostbite had had trouble explaining the concept of meditation to Danny too, thou it might have something to do with the way he said it. “It’s sort of meditating but still not.”

At this Gideon raised an eyebrow. “You meditate?” he asked a note of disbelief in his voice. “Show me?”

Rolling his shoulders Danny changed position to sit cross-legged his back straight and hands resting in his lap. The first part was always the same, take a deep breath, hold it then release it, then wait a beat before inhaling again. Once that became almost as natural as sleeping he let his thoughts go concentrating on that part of him in the center of his chest, the part that was always cold and pleasant like soft snow. He called it his frost powers but that wasn’t right, it didn’t even feel like a hard piece of ice like you’d expect when someone said Ice-core. No it was soft, refreshingly cold and calm like that perfect winter day right after a storm.

“Can you think back to that moment when you pushed your friend in to a difficult position?” Gideon asked in a low humming voice that somehow synchronized with Danny’s exhale.

Nodding Danny thought back to that moment, he’d asked Dash to make a distraction and then when he’d suggested going in to the restricted area Danny had shoved him. “I want you to ask yourself, if knowing what you knew then would you have done it any differently?” Said Gideon after a moment.

“Shouldn’t it be, If I knew what I know now, would I have made a diffident decision?” Asked Danny still breathing in the same rhythm not losing his hold of the memory.

“No Daniel, what you knew then.” Said Gideon in a harder tone. “Would you have made another decision?” Thinking about the question for a moment Danny shook his head. “Alright, now go back to the things you think you could have done differently and ask the same question.”

Danny did, he knew exactly where to start. The memory of the day was all too clear in his mind, the market was the first thing that came to mind. He could have pretended to enjoy it, he could have walked around with Sam and Tucker and pretended he wasn’t bothered and they might not have gone in to the mall. But he hadn’t, he’d made his friends feel bad for dragging him through the Christmas market in the rain when they knew he hated Christmas. Would he have done it any diffidently that day? No.

And the next question… Had he been right in hitting his friends with his ghost ray, to save Dash? If he hadn’t he might have gotten Sam and Tucker out before anyone saw them, before they were trapped. And all he had to do was let Dash die in that explosion. No he wouldn’t have done it any differently.

He wouldn’t have done anything differently. If he could remember going around taking pictures with Sam’s phone he wouldn’t have done it differently. He would still have given the only way for him to communicate with Sam and Tucker to the agents, he would still have told them that Vlad was the villain, although he regretted it now feeling pretty sure that Vlad was going to take his revenge soon.

Ghosting around disarming the bombs was something he’d never wanted to do differently, only one had gone off, only one and he’d been there to protect everyone from the blast. And then he’d saved them from the falling ceiling, he’d saved them and they should be thankful. They should thank him for saving their small lives. He could have let them die, could have let them get crushed by their own decisions instead of saving them.

And what did he get for his effort, Phantom menace, the ghost who caused the building to fall down, the ghost who killed people because they deserved it, because he wanted it. He should have let the roof squash them, should have frozen their feet’s to the ground. Why had he even let his food run away, he could have had so much more if he’d only let the celling fall and then there would have been a banquet where he could feast on the suffering, the fear, the anxiety and tears of the survivor.

He would have done it, he was about to, the meal of his lifetime was just within his grasp and then just like it had been back before when the black haired girl shot him, if that white woman hadn’t shot him. There had been his own pain, his own weakness, He’d screamed as all the power within him was suddenly drained and his humanity took over.

His humanity?

What was he thinking. Danny hadn’t realized his thoughts had wonder of images from not only the mall but Chicago flashed through his mind. Memories he’d wanted to burry, to get away from but that always resurfaced in his nightmares. They were wonderful and at the same time terrifying and why the hell was he thinking about devouring human pain and fear.

Danny had to tear himself away from his memories, away from his feeling and that disgusting train of thought. It felt like trying to swim against a current and at the same time waking up from a deep sleep.

Cold fingers touched his forehead and Danny opened his eyes his heart shipping a beat as fear gripped him. For a moment he didn’t know where he was, and then the room came in to focused. He was lying on his side on the couch his face pressed against the soft cochins a cool soft hand pushing his bangs away from his face and Gideon’s concerned gray green eyes staring in to his own.

Soft wrinkles formed around Gideon’s eyes as he smiled. “You fell asleep.” he said softly giving Danny a hand up. The boy still looked confused and he repeatedly looked over his shoulders as if expecting to see something standing behind him.

“How long.” Asked Danny rubbing at his tired eyes, his hands were shaking.

“Just for a couple of minutes.” Gideon sat down on the table in front of Danny, much closer than he would normally sit. “Most people fall asleep meditation in the beginning, and with that fever you might just need the sleep.”

“Fever?” Asked Danny lifting a hand to feel his own forehead.

Nodding Gideon looked Danny in the eyes. “I think we should call it for today don’t you? Go home and get some rest Danny, you look like you need it.” He got up and waited for Danny to do the same.

Rubbing at his aching head Danny looked around the room one more time. He had the strangest feeling of being observed by someone or something he couldn’t see. And then he realized how silly that sounded and bent down to put on his shoes.

**Author's Note:**

> What can I say Danny got problems and has to learn how to deal with his more questionable dessisions and the consequenses of his actions.


End file.
